My new cellphone.

I’ve just bought another cell phone. My first in five years.

My new phone makes more sounds than my old phone, and I don’t know yet, what all the new sounds mean.

Being an old man…. I already had strange noises coming from my body.   Now I have more.

The other day, I was blowing my nose a bit too vigorously and I farted…then my cell phone rang. It scared me so bad I had to sit down.

I can’t get use to the vibrate mode. It tickles.  I’m close to seventy years old so……. a little tickle every now and then is a good thing.

I’ve started calling myself just for the sensation. My girlfriend and I call each other with our phones in the vibrate mode, while sharing a glass of wine. Don’t knock it.  You ought to see our “selfies”.

C. Allen Benson