A Farmer’s answer to the U.S. Census Bureau.


by C. Allen Benson.
Inspired by P. R. Graves.


I got a cow, a pig, a sow, and a plow.

Dirty hands and a sweaty brow.

I got a calf-and-a-half, down the road.

Three creeks, two dogs, one pond, no toads.


I got a mule in the field, I have to feed.

And a jackass like you, who want answers from me.

About things that are none of your concern.

Please take this seriously.

I think it’s my turn.