Uncouth Observations

or……………………. HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED?


 

Why do people look into their handkerchiefs after blowing their noses?

What are they expecting to find?


Why is it, I develop a sneezing attack, and sneeze four times in a row, right as I’m merging into traffic during rush-hour?  There’s snot all over the place, my steering wheel is wet with drool,  and an eighteen wheeler won’t let me in.

Text and drive??  Hell…I can’t even handle normal bodily functions and drive.


 

 

…. HOW ABOUT….?

Those automatic bathroom devices.

If there’s going to be one automatic device in a bathroom, then all of them should be  automatic?

It’s irritating to have the water turn on with hand motion, but not the paper towel dispenser.

It’s disconcerting for the bathroom light to switch on when you open the door but then it’s downright embarrassing to be caught waving your hands around in the air, trying to make the damn water faucet come on.

It outta be a rule…..mixing automatic and manual devices in bathrooms, should not be allowed.

More importantly….how about those automatic toilet- flushers?  How do they know when I’m through?  Have you ever been caught reaching around for the flusher, but couldn’t find it, then all of a sudden—–WHOOSH?  It’ll take your breath away and feels like somebody just sneezed on your butt. (It’s really upsetting if you’re sittin’ there half-asleep with a hangover.)

Those auto-flushers make it hard on one, if one should want to look at the result of one’s labor, or if the Doctor has told you to bring in a stool sample, or you’re just in a curious mood because you had “mexican” for supper last night?  You can do it, but you have to be fast.

I don’t know about you, but sometimes I have an encore performance.  Premature flushing breaks my train-of-thought.

It outta be a rule…..mixing automatic and manual devices in bathrooms, should not be allowed.

cab


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